McNeese Annual Student Senior Exhibition

Senior Show Thesis 3 AM

Spring 2015 Senior Thesis Exhibition. Shearman Fine Arts Center Grand Gallery. Reception Thursday April 23rd. 

In this series titled 3 AM, I share with my viewers an in depth view into my dreams, fears, and nightmares. The reason I chose 3 AM as the title of my series is that it refers to the time that I would awake from the dream. Using myself as the subject, I depict a dream that has reoccurred many times in the last few years of my life.

              The particular dream I have is one in which I am sleeping and I awaken to voices yelling “Blind” in a  raspy voice. Every time I wake up from my sleep in my dream, there are negative entities pulling me at every limb as if they are trying to carry me away. I am never able to scream because my teeth are crumbling in my mouth. Then, I awaken from the dream screaming and sweating.

These dreams reflect the degree of stress and the pressure that revolves around me from my personal life, as well as work and school. And so I believe those negative entities in my dream are my daily struggles pulling at me and trying to make me weak, dragging me into the darkness, which is what the black environment surrounding me represents. I incorporated writings about my dreams into the actual print, to show my vulnerability to be a viewer and the fact that I am baring all.

The photographers who I would consider my biggest influence on the way in which I chose to portray this series would have to be Rimma and Valeriy Gerlovina. I was inspired by their series Perhappiness that inspired me to create these images without the use of props. I feel that by not using props and instead focusing on body language, my work is more personal and relatable.

This dream is a self-revelation for myself because it always occurs when I feel as though I am losing myself, and control of my life. And, by recreating the dream into a series it has helped me personally. As far as I can remember my dreams have always seemed to mean more than just my mind wandering at night. I do feel that viewers will understand my concept because everyone has had a point in their life where they feel like they have no control. I really want viewers to get the sense of fear and weakness when they look at my images and I think that it would be interesting to display these images in the way that I see them when having that nightmare.